John, what wonderful programs and what a gift you’ve given your children by fostering their unique processes of healing in this way. I remember, after my mother passed away, how very much I was mindful of my father’s grief and, too, of his utter devotion to and beautiful love for his children. Being an empathetic child didn’t lack for some intensely heavy shit at too young an age; but I can now see the gift of it. I mean, having both witnessed and experienced the aftermath, during that time I also got to dream of a life that would be lighter and happier. Some may argue that it’s a form of escape. Ok fine. But I mostly see it as a roadmap, loosely navigated- with detours and pit stops- creating and evolving into the life I’m now living. Which is lighter and happier. I wish you, your children and your in-laws similar hope and peace as you honor your grief. I so enjoyed reading your insights (beautifully written!). Thank you so SO much for offering a fresh voice.
Being told that, categorically, he knows what he’s talking about and she doesn’t, however minor a part of any given conversation, perpetuates the ugliness of this world and holds back its light. After my book Wanderlust came out in 2000, I found myself better able to resist being bullied out of my own perceptions and interpretations. On two occasions around that time, I objected to the behavior of a man, only to be told that the incidents hadn’t happened at all as I said, that I was subjective, delusional, overwrought, dishonest–in a nutshell, female.